The Skip

 Outside at the back of Applied Science 2. The Publicity Agent is fiddling about with a data cable. It runs from his window on the first floor to a huge orange coloured builder's rubbish bin in the number 4 Emergency Assembly Area. The Capt'n emerges from Applied Science 2.

Capt'n
Ah, there you are! What on earth are you up to now?

Publicity Agent (proudly)
This is my new office. This ... whatever-you-call-it.

Capt'n
Skip.

Publicity Agent
Skip?

Capt'n (emphatically)
Yes, skip!

Publicity Agent
Well I can do a jig.
(hums "Irish Washerwoman" and skips about like a barefoot person on an ants' nest)
di-di-di-daa-didely-ey-di-ey-di-ey

Capt'n (indicates "stop")
It's hardly River Dance. I meant that the bin is called a 'skip'. Tell me, why are you moving your office?

Publicity Agent
We have this arrangement, to buy new computers we lease out our offices. I'm the first, my office is leased already.

Capt'n
Who gets the computer?

Publicity Agent
That geologist bloke who gave the talk at the Bar.
(see Inaugural Campbell Lecture- ed.)

Capt'n
Is that reasonable, you lose your office and he gets a computer?

Publicity Agent
I'm sure equity and justice were the dominant considerations in the decision making process, as they always are.

Capt'n
Oh. Have you noticed what nice weather we've been having lately?

Publicity Agent
Yeah, it's a good thing because I haven't organized a roof yet.

Capt'n
Who's your old office being leased to?

Publicy Agent
Some crowd that want to hold meetings in it.

Capt'n
Meetings! In that shoebox! It barely holds two chairs?

(Publicity Agent is turning out his pockets littering the surrounds with bits of chalk, broken pens, short pencils, paper clips, ...)

Publicity Agent
I've got it written down somewhere ... ah, what's this?
(reads from scrap of paper)
OK, I'll do it for A's on both assignments.
Fifi.
(pales, crushes note into a small ball and swallows it, finds second scrap of paper)
Oh, it's the Shane Stone Fan Club.

Capt'n
I wonder what they want the second chair for? Look enough of your foolishness, what about this week's promo? What have you done? Nothing, I expect.

(Publicity Agent looks at the ground, embarrassed, shuffles feet in some rubbish next to the skip)

Publicity Agent (with interest)
What's this? A pressure pack can. It's blackboard paint. Hey, there's some left. That's it! That's it!
(presses button on can ....)

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